The Blood Gulch OPS
by TheDirtyShizno
Summary: Caboose gets into Project Freelancer, while Agent Hawaii hangs out with Tucker and Church.


**The sequel to the ordeal begins! (URLhere, s/9221781/1/Agent-Hawaii-The-Ordeal-Begins I understand it was bad, it was my first story. The next chapters are much better) This story begins the Blood Gulch OPS, a series of failures put on by a mixture of original characters and non-original characters. As with my other stories, all ideas not owned by me ARE owned by somebody else. **

"All right, welcome to Blue Team!" came Church's enthusiastic voice. Chi, Hawaii's AI, chimed in on how it was interesting on how Caboose seemed just fine about being used as payment. As a freelancer, Agent Hawaii has started a bidding war for his services. The Reds bit a fancy shotgun, while the blues outdid them and bit Caboose.

"All right! Free cookies for everyone! Not everyone you fool, then there will be none left for us!"

"Yeah, Church, what's up with Caboose? Is he one of those people who has multiple personalities?"

"We dunno. He's still pretty new here, whereas Tucker and I have been here since Flowers died..."

Rob went around getting acquainted, and suddenly found he was very lucky indeed to be on Blue Team. There was a sentient tank.

"Oh! Hello there, are you new? Caboose is also new, and so is that handsome robot, Lopez," the Tank suddenly said.

"Handsome? So you're a female tank?"

"You'd better believe it! And stop staring at my treads!"

"You should apologize," came Chi's voice.

"Uh, sorry, big tank lady."

"Oh that's quite alright mister, I just hope you can change oil as well as you can flatter a girl!"

"I don't mean to brag, but I did change the oil on a covenant banshee once. Of course, it wasn't exactly oil..."

Meanwhile, back at Red Base

"Donut, I need you to commence operation point my gun at the traitor."

"Sorry sir, but I thought we agreed traitor was synonymous with Grif!"

"Drat! I'm going to need you to commence operation Alpha Tango Uno Gamma, get Lopez to kill the traitor!"

"Claro. entiendo que haga todo por ti. ¿Por qué no hacerlo usted mismo? Te encanta esa escopeta mucho por él sin haber sido utilizado."

(Sure. get me to do everything for you. Why not do it yourself? You love that shotgun a lot for it never having used it. )

"Indeed Lopez! He says he'll do it Sarge, but he wants a box of crayons first."

"Oh, sí. Me encanta pintar." (Oh yes. I just love coloring.)

**Meanwhile, back at Blue Base**

"and that's how I met Chi here!"

"Interesting, mind if I say hello to Chi by granting him access to my computer system?"

"I would enjoy the opportunity to meet with her, and we could exchange... Data. Yes, data was the word I was looking for."

"Well, alright, just have him back before ten." With a wink, Hawaii walked off.

Once he arrived back at Blue Base, he found his head surprisingly empty without Chi hearing his thoughts.

"Oh well, nothing like manual labor to consume my time." he thought to himself. After a lot of scrubbing, his armor was just as dirty as before. Abandoning that idea, he asked Tucker and discovered that there was an armor cleaner downstairs. Since boredom was clearly better than work, he set out to see if he could find an extra pair of armor. Caboose was thoughtful, and it took him almost a half hour to find out that Hawaii could borrow one of his, after all, it was buried under babies and kittens and intense feelings of joy and anger. Heading over to Caboose's quarters, he found the bunny. Hawaii just kept walking, thinking nothing of it.

Caboose walked out back to find Sheila.

"Hello, Sheila? I made you muffins!" he said, holding up the burnt piles of what was once batter.

"Oh, why thank you Caboose, how thoughtful, though seeing as I am a tank, I am not used to ingesting organic material. Besides, you interrupted my conversation."

"Conversion? Were you talking to that duck again? I shall go get the firetruck!"

"If you must know, I was talking to that nice young man's AI."

"Who, the one named HI? I bet he didn't even actually say hi!" Caboose felt quite jealous, and remembered that Hawaii's armor was being cleaned. He went and got Hawaii's armor, put it on, and went outside to where they were.

"Oh! Agent Hawaii! For some reason my sensors think you are Caboose. But I'm glad they're wrong. Your friend Chi here is such the sweet talker. It's been fun, but he insists on going back to you now."

"Yes, I see," Caboose replied with a ridiculously low voice that sounded nothing like Hawaii.

"Hey Caboose, ready for another round of hide and don't seek?" Church asked Hawaii.

"What? Oh. I'm wearing Cabooses armor, mines getting washed."

"Well, I guess that explains it... But why not just wear some regular clothes? Scared of the reds?"

"No, I'm scared of your tank. She's seriously scary, always telling me not to look at her treads when I'm not and always trying to run me over."

"Wait, she tried to run you over?"

"We were playing tag."

"You were playing tag... With a tank."

"Yep."

"I bet you get along great with Caboose."

Caboose was confused. The new voice in his head told him to did things that didn't make sense.

" , I would highly recommend not putting things into your mouth." On the other hand, they were getting along just fine inside his head.

"And THAT is why you should never throw grenades at your own feet. It may look cool, but you almost always end up dead."

"Thanks new guy! What do you think about fire safety?"

"Panic."

"Really?! Me too!" There was also another voice in his head, O'Malley.

"You fool! Why have you come here?"

"I was going to talk to Sheila."

"Not you fool, the other fool."

"Ah. Wait, what other fool? Tucker is stupid, but nobody here is a fool."

"Quiet you fool."

"Omega. How wonderful to see you again." The two voices did nothing to make Caboose's mind stable, in fact, it did almost the opposite.

"So, Hawaii, you said you wanted to play hide and don't seek?"

"No you fool. It is stupid and I do not see the tactical advantage to doing something so fun and exciting!"

"Ok then Hawaii, you can go first!"

"Hola Sheila. Veo que has estado haciendo bien, pero yo he sido enviado aquí para matar el retardo independiente." (Hello Shiela, I see you have been doing well, but I have been sent here to kill the freelancer retard.)

"Oh, hello Lopez, how have you been?"

"Uh, Sheila?"

"Yes Caboose?"

"You fool. We knew that you knew we were Caboose for the entire time you thought we weren't Caboose since you are modeled off of the phyliss software you have the memory and advanced capabilities necessary to do this."

"*crackle crackle* Freelancer command to Agent Hawaii, your mission has been compromised, we have a shuttle waiting for you in the field by the tank, reach the objective as quickly as possible to score bonus points, dude. Vic out." Suddenly Caboose, Sheila, Lopez, O'Malley and Chi noticed that there was a shuttle right next to them. In fact, Caboose's back was pressed up against it as he tried to avoid Lopez. Chi noticed, and alerted Caboose to the fact that without the shuttle's aid, there was only a two point seven percent chance of not dying. Seeing how high a number that was, Caboose opted for O'Malley's solution.

"MY NAME IS MICHAEL J CABOOSE, AND I, HATE, MOPEDS!" Before he could charge Lopez however, Sheila's barrel smacked Caboose in the chest, sending him sailing into the open and waiting door to the shuttle.

"Oh, bueno. No me habían dado ninguna crayones para apuñalarlo con todos modos." (Oh well. They hadn't given me any crayons to stab him with anyway.)

"Welcome home." North's voice greeted Caboose as he arrived at The Mother of Invention.

"Thanks," came Hawaii's voice, as Chi had taken over and OMalley had been smart enough not to butt in.

**Well, that was the first chapter of the sequel! I hope you all liked it, as there shall be more to come, and remember, I WANT REVIEWS. All who do not comply will be shot. :3**


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